Random Thoughts on Single Parenthood

First off, I must say that being a single parent is the worst thing ever. I was up all night with the two babies. Fiona is teething and miserable. No medications seem to help her at all. She is drooling all over everything, crying nonstop, she won't eat anything and only wants to drink, drink, drink. Myles ended up in my bed just so that I could get some sleep when she was. He would kick himself upwards until his head hit the headboard and start screaming. And, as if that all was not enough, poor Stuart woke up with leg pains. Luckly some Tylenol stopped those and he went back to sleep. Macy was the only one that slept all night, but she was up way too early this morning and had the most purple eyes when I dropped her off at school. I warned the teachers and told them to call if things got too bad.

The pillowtop on our bed didn't get quite dry enough. I felt it several times last night and it felt dry, so I made the bed. However, upon entering it to sleep, I quickly realized that it wasn't as dry as I had thought. I stripped the bed back down and am trying to get it air-dried before bed tonight. Why can't you just put those things in the dryer?

Now, onward, we are out of milk. I wanted to stop and pick some up yesterday before Grady left, but was running behind schedule and needed to get back to get them to the airport. We MUST go to the store today :(. I also need to pick up some dog food for the two animals that now call their 10x10 kennel home. I will not let them out because I am afraid of what they'll bring home next.

Today is Stuart's real birthday, and I have yet to do anything special for him. He didn't want anything for lunch. He didn't want to talk to anyone on the phone. He really wanted to play a game with me, but Myles is ruining that. We are trying to play Go FIsh and I just wanted it to be Stu and I.

As I stood in the shower this morning, I kept thinking about the four kids sitting the living room watching TV. I kept telling myself that I needed to hurry and get back to them just in case they needed me. But I just kept turning the water hotter and hotter and standing there, trying to suck up enough energy to make it through the day. I finally got to the point that I was afraid that I was going to run out of hot water and didn't want to get the shocking cold spray, so out I came. The phone was ringing, the kids weren't answering it and I had to run through the house in my towel to get it. How nice it was to talk to my sister for a bit. Having another adult to visit with is sooooo nice.

I turned on the radio while I made lunch and cleaned it up just to listen to something else besides kids fighting, whining, crying and all of the kidTV that comes along with it.

So what does all of this boil down to???? I MISS MY HUSBAND. I miss his help, his friendship, his smiles, his voice, his extra set of hands. I miss the love of my life and can't wait for Friday afternoon to be here. only 74 more hours until I can go pick him up.....and, yes, I am counting down. So, all of you single parents out there, I feel for you. You are absolutely amazing and I don't want to trade spaces with any of you.